Tuesday, July 12, 2011

My "Failed Novels" Folder



Contents include:

"Slack is Beautiful" (worked on in 2009) 115 handwritten pages + notes [Status: unfinished]

"Poisonville" (worked on in 2002) 114 handwritten pages + notes [Status: unfinished]

"The Beta Sequence" (notes only) 2006 & 2008

"Blasphemous Rumors" (worked on in 2006) 25 typed pages + notes [Status: unfinished]

"Andy Warhol Novel" (worked on in 2007) 60 typed pages + notes [Status: unfinished]

"Subhuman" (worked on in 2007/2008) 151 typed pages + notes [Status: complete, but in desperate need of revision/rewriting]

"Jormungand" (notes only) 2010

* * * *

Slack is Beautiful was an attempt to write an airy romantic comedy in the Reality Bites/Friends vein.

Poisonville was a crime novel that was my attempt to take the experience of playing a Grand Theft Auto video game and turning it into a novel.

The Beta Sequence was never a serious project: it was meant to be a spoof of the type of novel written by authors such as Robert Ludlum, Dan Brown, and Jon Land.

Blasphemous Rumors was to have been a murder mystery set at a fictitious college campus in upstate New York.

Subhuman was a short novel that revolved around my experiences as a bookseller. I still hope to rework it into something publishable one day. I'm just too lazy to rewrite the parts that need to be rewritten. But I feel with some tighter editing I could get something worthwhile from it.

Jormungand was to have been my Wes Anderson novel, about a cursed man who embarked on a journey aboard a submarine to try to find the legendary sea serpent Jormungand, in the hope that imbibing some blood from the monster would dispel his curse. At one point I did type out 30 or so pages for this project but sadly the document is now lost.

The Warhol novel is in development hell but I still hope to finish it someday.

Not included in this folder are my notes for So Below, a project I was working on in mid-2008 that was to have been my La-Bas. Mainly as I seem to have misplaced them.

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